It can be a true art to be just an ear to listen or a shoulder to cry on without expecting something in return, be that loyalty, closer friendship, love or an ego boost etc.
If you want to support someone then its important to jote that the role does not come with conditions. We listen because we can, we hold a hand because it gives comfort.
Changing the mindset so that, often subconsciously, we are not expecting to gain anything from it may take a while and we will often be suprised at ourselves. We all hope that we are selfless, ego free but its suprising how well hidden we can keep that need for an ego boost or gain through ‘helping’ others.
Being selfless is not necessarily a natural state for us Humans. However we have evolved enough now to know we would be better people for it. Being selfless takes courage. Your actions are no longer conditional for strengthening loyalty, making sure someone has got your back, making allies and so on. Your flying by the seat of your pants! Your not tied down by any ‘contracts’ that you have made with others and your relationships with them. You have freed up not just yourself but those around you too. Its a hugely positive state to live in but at first may feel extremely scary.
There are a few rare folk out there that were born selfless. We treasure them, and very often worship them. Throughout history we have seen these precious people bring new teachings but also seen them endure great hardships so why did they do it? What we may see as hardship might well be viewed entirely differently by the people themselves. What we might think of as a hard time they might see as a fabulous life lesson and have gratitude for what they went theough. Its all relative.
So … How can we live our lives like the selfless teachers we admire. How do we change our mindsets?
1) Dont see someone in need of support as an opportunity or a chance to strengthen a relationship. Just be their support with no strings attached.
Yes. I did just hear you all shout “but I never see that as an opportunity!”. No. But our subconscious reptilian brain does. In our history it was a great survival tool.
2) Start tying to see hardships, upsetting life changes for the life lessons they are.
By allowing ourselves to see even the hardest time as having a silver lining it makes life suprisingly easier to endure. Also by seeing the positive amongst the shadow, we boost the light that surrounds us and attract more of it into our life.
Learning to help another and being a shoulder to cry on just because we can, witnessing the events that take place around us and not letting ourselves get entrenched in them…this is how we start changing that mind set.
Be the witness to the events of your own life. Stay that step back and let the light in. Living in the light is that step closer to the purity and love in the divinty of our Universe. Living our lives from a place of love, and not fear, allows us to happily help those around us selflessly. Expecting and wanting nothing in return.
In love and light
In La’kech
Namaste
Xxxx
Akasha Shamanka 